Worst Drunk Story....so far
The worst drunk story so far (although it's closely followed by two more...at least) is the time that Sue and I (pictured above) got drunk at a local bar...continued drinking at her house...and then she decided she needed cigarettes. Well...it was during the summer and it was hot outside so I decided that if I was to drive her to the store I wasn't going to wear any pants (it seemed logical at the time). I decided a t-shirt, underwear, socks and shoes would be enough. Anyways, we left...and no sooner did I get to the gate in her front yard I stepped in a hole...fell...and nearly peed on myself. I drove her to the store half naked and full of grass stains and a skinned knee.
Second worst....
Following closely is the time that we had left a bar and went back to Sue's house (we are starting to notice a trend here...). She was busy on the computer...so I went to sprawl out on the bed. The room started spinning....so I grabbed the bed rail and yelled that I was falling. She assured me I wasn't...so I got up and attempted to sit down in this really old fold up chair beside her. I placed my knee on it...and when I did my knee and entire leg went through the bastard! I, in my drunken state fell forward where I was stuck with my leg folded behind me for five minutes while Sue laughed and didn't help me out. Finally my drunkenly slow mind figured out how to get out of the stupid chair...but not without lots of bruises.
Third....
This has to be the time that Sue and I got drunk and were riding around and I started honking the horn at all the signs and yelling out what they said. In doing this a guy followed up thinking we were honking at him. When asked our names I told him Sue was "Batman" and I was "Peterpan" because "I am the pansy in tights". Another car passed by and I yelled that it was "Wonderwoman and her giant platypus". The young sir promtly excused himself and went inside his house. Some people just don't appreciate good beer. |
