Who Am I?

(Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Jack But You Were Afraid To Ask)

Who am I? This is the question that I have tried to answer for as long as I can remember. Other people have tried to answer this question for me, but I have rejected all their suggestions. So I must answer this question on my own. Am I what I look like? I'm a 19-year-old Caucasian male human being, 5'11", 230 lbs, with wavy brown hair and deep brown eyes. I also have a goofy grin, as you can see from the picture above :>. I am a little overweight, there is no disguising that, although I prefer to call myself "cuddly". But is my fat, skin, muscles and bones all that I am?

Am I what I do? I am a junior, studying English. I study hard and work harder to get good grades. But am I the grades I get or the university I attend?

Am I the things I enjoy doing? I enjoy surfing the web, chatting, reading, writing poetry, drawing cartoons, watching cartoons (especially anime), playing video games (Warcraft II for the PC and River City Ransom for the NES are my favorites), taking long walks, shopping, thinking romantic thoughts, talking to all my friends, answering e-mails, listening to music (80's, dance, techno, new age and classical are my faves), eating, sleeping, and many other things that I will not discuss here. But even though I like to do these things, they aren't who I am. Are they?

Am I who I choose to hang out with? Am I my friends? Sure my friends are a big part of my life, but they aren't me and can't be me. Am I who I admire? I might like the company of BBWs (Big Beautiful Women) on the Internet and real life, because I think cuddliness in a woman is a very attractive thing and I find BBWs some of the friendliest people around. Then is being a "fat admirer" all that I am?

Am I my personality? People say that I am a very creative, thoughtful and romantic guy. I like to care about things and people, and I like to do nice things for them. I like being intimate and close to people. I love physical contact...hugs and kisses and cuddles and caresses and nuzzles and all the touches that love provides. Although I'm a little shy towards strangers at first, as soon as I know someone, I'm very friendly and talkative without being rude of course. I dislike rude people and people who step on other people to get ahead. But are my thoughts and actions who I am?

The truth is, I have an identity as something other than my outward shell. I am a special, unique child of the living God of this universe and he has a purpose for my life that is totally different that anything my mortal mind can create. Even if suddenly everything about me that I mentioned before was somehow taken away, I would still have a identity with Jesus Christ. That is a very powerful thing to say. I don't need to look to the things of this world to discover who I am. All I need to do is to look at the God who created me. Although I do still like the other things too...