The definitive GRUESOME kite page on the internet.

"The (...) definitive (...) (kite) page (...) on the (...) (internet)." - The New York Times, September 24, 1997

The kite was probably invented in the 50's. They did a lot of inventing back then. That's when TV and Radio started. The name "Kite" derives from the greek "Kite", goddess of kites. There are basically 3 types of kites: Those that can't fly, those that just fly and finally those that can fly and could kill you if you are not careful. There are 5 million deaths linked to kites each year in the United States alone. That means, 5 million people that once had flown a kite in their lives and are now dead. Who knows if they would still be alive today if instead they had watched TV like everybody else.

In the category of kites that don't fly there are at least 3 subcategories and these are: Bricks, Kitchen sinks and Whales.

BRICK kite

KITCHEN SINK kite

WHALE kite

In the category of kites that simply fly there are only 4 subcategories that are worth mentioning here and ever remembering: Box, Delta, Eddy, Hargrave and Parafoil. The rest are scary and make children cry when they see them.

Finally, in the category of kites that can kill you there are: Radioactive kites, Razor blade kites, Sneaky kites and Take you up to the moon kites. All these kites can be purchased at you local arms depot and are usually flown by monsters.

RADIOACTIVE kite	RAZOR BLADE kite
SNEAKY kite	TAKE YOU TO THE MOON kite

Remember, Kites can be fun if you fly them responsibly. This isn't a game.

For more information on kites, please go here: Peter's Kite Site.
I've brought together at great expense a collection of kite photos.
Also, there's this guy who's threatened to make faces at me if I don't include a link to his Virtual Kite Zoo.
If you are a secret agent then you should probably already know about this.

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Email all praise and gratitude to: Gilles Lehoux

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