Fecalicious: hello... I found you on Find a Buddy
Fecalicious: my name is Eric Feca
FSUbabe026: hi:-)
Fecalicious: brb
FSUbabe026: i'm lindsay
FSUbabe026: ok..
Fecalicious: ok
Fecalicious: where are you from?
Fecalicious: I'm from the Netherlands
FSUbabe026: florida..
FSUbabe026: you are?
Fecalicious: yes... I live in Amsterdam
FSUbabe026: like..is that near newfoundland?
Fecalicious: but English is my second language
FSUbabe026: oh...
FSUbabe026: i dont want to sound..blonde but is that in
canada?
Fecalicious: no
Fecalicious: Europe
FSUbabe026: oh thats cool:-)
Fecalicious: yes
Fecalicious: Amsterdam is a fun place
FSUbabe026: have you lived there all your life?
Fecalicious: EVERYTHING is legal
FSUbabe026: i'm sure
Fecalicious: yes, born and raised here
Fecalicious: have you ever been to Europe?
FSUbabe026: yep..paris...germany switz...austria
Fecalicious: nice!!
Fecalicious: but not Holland?
FSUbabe026: no..
Fecalicious: ah, alas
FSUbabe026: have you ever been in america?
Fecalicious: you haven't truly experienced Europe
until you come to a
Fecalicious: Amsterdam
Fecalicious: yes, I went to New York one time
when I was very little, but I don't remember
much
FSUbabe026: thats cool
FSUbabe026: you have to visit florida..its the best state..so
many beaches and everything
Fecalicious: yes, I've heard a lot about Florida
Fecalicious: and Disney world
Fecalicious: and Miami
FSUbabe026: yup:-)its the best
Fecalicious: have you lived there all your life?
FSUbabe026: yeah..
Fecalicious: sounds like fun!
Fecalicious: how old are you? I'm 20
FSUbabe026: it is.....
FSUbabe026: oh..well i'm 16...
Fecalicious: you're 16 and you go to FSU?
FSUbabe026: lol no i just liek that university...its where i'm
most likely going to go
Fecalicious: they have a good football team, yes?
FSUbabe026: oh yeah
Fecalicious: I have heard that the best American
football team is Virginia Tech
FSUbabe026: they've won many championships
Fecalicious: because they have this famous boy,
Vick
FSUbabe026: welll i dunno
Fecalicious: I hear the Americans worship this Vick
FSUbabe026: i dont...i have actually never heard of
him:-)
Fecalicious: really!
Fecalicious: do you watch college football?
FSUbabe026: yeah
FSUbabe026: some of it
FSUbabe026: not all the time
Fecalicious: i see
Fecalicious: do you like Jesus?
Fecalicious: I think that everyone who doesn't like
Jesus is going to hell
FSUbabe026: yes of course i do
FSUbabe026: i'm christian...how about you
Fecalicious: I am too
Fecalicious: anyone who isn't is a dirty heathen
Fecalicious: all pagans burn in hell, my minister
says
FSUbabe026: well good...i just went to this awesome
concert the other night with all of these christian bands..it
was so much fun
FSUbabe026: pagans...witches right?
Fecalicious: pagans are anyone who doesn't
believe in the full Power of Our Lord Jesus
Fecalicious: be they filthy Muslims, godforsaken
Jews or evil dirty Hindus
FSUbabe026: well acually..i dont judge people...even if
they aren't christians..if they haven't done anything to me i
dont have a reaosn to be against them...one of my best guy
friends is jewisha nd i just found that out a month ago..but
that doesn't mean i'm not going to talk to him
Fecalicious: really? I was taught never to associate
with anyone who is not a Pure Aryan Christian
FSUbabe026: why not??
Fecalicious: that's what my minister told us
Fecalicious: and my parents
FSUbabe026: the world would be so much more peaceful
if you gave everyone a chance..christian or not
FSUbabe026: thats not what they tell us here
Fecalicious: that makes sense to me
Fecalicious: perhaps my minister is a bit extreme
FSUbabe026: maybe
Fecalicious: like the other day, he insisted that we
all follow him to his barn and have a Christian
Purifying Sex Ritual
Fecalicious: my parents went, but I was busy with
Bible study
FSUbabe026: thats different...what do they do?
Fecalicious: I don't know much about it...
something about using the minister's pure semen
to fertilize the earth and mixing it with pure
Christian blood
FSUbabe026: thats....christianity stuff???
Fecalicious: yes, my minister said Jesus started the
tradition
FSUbabe026: you guys must believe things a bit differently
over there..
FSUbabe026: i've neevr heard of that
Fecalicious: you know, like it says in the Holy
Bible..."This is my semen, which shall be given
up for you"
FSUbabe026: all i know is to stay pure until i'm married
Fecalicious: yes, we believe that too
FSUbabe026: and so far i still am
FSUbabe026: most girls lose it in highschool
Fecalicious: our minister says the best way to stay
pure is to engage in the Purifying Sex Ritual so
that you are pure for holy matrimony
Fecalicious: it is good to stay pure
FSUbabe026: i know
FSUbabe026: do you have a picture?
Fecalicious: our minister says if you aren't pure
before marriage, you go to hell
Fecalicious: yes, hold on, let me find it
FSUbabe026: k
Fecalicious: ok, sorry that took so long
Fecalicious: here
FSUbabe026: k
FSUbabe026 signed on at 10:58:58 PM.
Fecalicious wants to send file C:\Temp\Eric3.jpg.
FSUbabe026 received C:\Temp\Eric3.jpg.
Fecalicious: they took that at Bible Study a few
weeks ago
FSUbabe026 wants to directly connect.
FSUbabe026 is now directly connected.
FSUbabe026:
FSUbabe026: thats me
Fecalicious: ooh, you are attractive... but I mustn't
have lustful thoughts or I will be condemned to
Hell
FSUbabe026: yeah..dont wanna do that now..
FSUbabe026: thanks though
Fecalicious: no indeed
Fecalicious: hell is a miserable place
FSUbabe026: i'm sure..
Fecalicious: do you have a minister?
FSUbabe026: yeah
FSUbabe026: i think so..i dont go to church all the time
FSUbabe026: i go with one of my friend severy so often
Fecalicious: oh, I see
Fecalicious: what's your church called?
FSUbabe026: first baptist of tampa
Fecalicious: Ours is called the 7th Holland Bible
Church of Jesus the Delicious
FSUbabe026: but i was baptized as a lutheran..theres no
church i can find close to me that is lutheran
Fecalicious: our minister renamed it that
Fecalicious: it used to be just 7th Holland Bible
Church
FSUbabe026: cool
Fecalicious: some say our minister is crazy in the
head
Fecalicious: but I think he is a genius
Fecalicious: he has a true insight into the Word of
Jesus
FSUbabe026: yeah
Fecalicious: like the whole lost passage in the
Bible he discovered, about how ministers must
deflower all women to purify them for their
weddings
Fecalicious: my sister is getting married soon...
her deflowering is scheduled for next Tuesday
Fecalicious: she is a bit nervous about the whole
thing
FSUbabe026: aww thats cool
FSUbabe026: how old is she
Fecalicious: she's 15
FSUbabe026: shes only 15 and shes getting married?
Fecalicious: yes, our minister says if a woman isn't
married by 18, she's going to hell
FSUbabe026: thats bizzarre
FSUbabe026: does he make this up??
FSUbabe026: because i've neevr innmy life heard that
Fecalicious: no, he hears the Word of Jesus
Fecalicious: and whatever Jesus says, we follow
FSUbabe026: .....ok
FSUbabe026: well i cant get married until i'm 18 because
its gonna take longer than 2 years to find my true love...
FSUbabe026: i dont wanna get married until i'm done with
college anyways
Fecalicious: 18, eh? just make sure you're not 19
when you get married, for that's too old for Jesus
FSUbabe026: no it will be older than 19
Fecalicious: oh... well, to each his own, I suppose
Fecalicious: respect, yo
Fecalicious: that's what I'm talkin' about
Fecalicious: R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Fecalicious: - Aretha Franklin
FSUbabe026: respect what..
Fecalicious: oh, just respect in general
FSUbabe026: myself?
Fecalicious: yes, yourself
Fecalicious: and each other
FSUbabe026: oh ok
Fecalicious: do you eat the bread and drink the
wine in church?
FSUbabe026: no...
Fecalicious: our minister keeps all the wine for
himself, but we still get to eat the bread
Fecalicious: sometimes he drinks so much Holy
Wine that he has trouble standing up
FSUbabe026: isn't that a sin...to drink?
FSUbabe026: to drink to the point you cant stand
Fecalicious: for us, yes
Fecalicious: which is why our minister keeps the
wine from us
FSUbabe026: then hes committed a sin
Fecalicious: he says it's not a sin for ministers to
drink the holy wine
FSUbabe026: yeah but thats him saying that...
FSUbabe026: holy wine is supossed ot be for
everyone..not just one person
Fecalicious: it is?
FSUbabe026: yeah
Fecalicious: oh...
FSUbabe026: and the bread
FSUbabe026: of course
Fecalicious: perhaps our minister is a bit extreme
FSUbabe026: yeah i think he is
Fecalicious: my grandpa was going to tell the
church that he was crazy, but he mysteriously
died right before he could say anything, right
after he ate his communion bread
Fecalicious: it was a sad day... he ate the bread
and started foaming at the mouth and keeled
over right on the church floor
FSUbabe026: he had a seizure
Fecalicious: the minister said it was his time, and
God took him home
Fecalicious: the last words grandpa said before he
choked on his own tongue was something like
"the bread... poisoned..."
Fecalicious: but he was just talking gibberish
because he was seeing God
FSUbabe026: then he was probably poisned
Fecalicious: who, God was?
FSUbabe026: no
FSUbabe026: your grandfather
Fecalicious: he was?
Fecalicious: by who? God?
Fecalicious: oh no, it couldn't have been SATAN,
could it???
Fecalicious: now I'm scared
FSUbabe026: no..the minister?
FSUbabe026: satan maybe...but someone had to put it in
there
Fecalicious: now why would our minister want to
punish my grandpa?
FSUbabe026: i dont know...but from what i hear your
minister seems to go beyond some things..maybe your
grandpa didn't do something the minister wanted him to
believe in?
FSUbabe026: or was your grandpa real into christainity
too?
Fecalicious: ya think???????
FSUbabe026: yeah
Fecalicious: well, he was about to stand up and
condemn the minister...
Fecalicious: but no, the minister wouldn't do
something like that... he is a holy man
Fecalicious: a holy, righteous, handsome, virile
man
FSUbabe026: i mean your minister..from what i
hear..sounds scary ..
Fecalicious: of pure Christian blood
FSUbabe026: some holy people aren't really holy
FSUbabe026: expecially this girl i once knew
Fecalicious: ah
Fecalicious: tell me about this girl
FSUbabe026: they just say they are
Fecalicious: ok, you seem like a very wise, patient
and caring person
FSUbabe026: thankyou
Fecalicious: so I'm gonna stop messing with you
now because you're obviously too naive to realize
I'm just screwing with ya
Fecalicious: HAHAHA