"...with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!" -Homer
"The strong must protect the sweet." -Homer
"Whooaa, someone smells stinky! Oh, it's me." -Barney
"I thought I'd never hear the screams of pain or see the look of terror in a young man's eyes. Thank heaven for children."
"I'll get right to the point. I'm getting older, fatter, and uglier... help me find a man before it's too late." -Selma
"And... Lord, we're especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is, except for solar, which is just a pipe dream. Anyway, I'd like to thank you for the occasional moments of peace and love our family's experienced... well, not today. You saw what happened. Oh, Lord, be honest. Are we the most pathetic family in the universe, or what?" -Homer
"Have you always been a chick? I mean, y'know don't wanna offend you, but you were born a man, weren't you? You can tell me, I'm open-minded." -Homer
"That's where I saw the leprechaun. He told me to burn things."
"Maybe I can't concentrate because of all of your cooties!""It's called "lice", and it's nothing to be ashamed of. " -Milhouse & Lisa
"Well it doesn't matter how you feel inside, you know? It's what shows up on the surface that counts. That's what my mother taught me. Take all your bad feelings and push them down, all the way down, past your knees until you're almost walking on them. And then you'll fit in, and you'll be invited to parties, and boys will like you, and happiness will follow." -Marge
"Look at that pig, stuffing his face with with donuts on my time. That's right, keep eating. Little do you know you're drawing closer ever closer to the poison donut. There is a poison one, isn't there, Smithers?" -Monty Burns
"Oh, it's not a swindle. What you do is, see.. You give 'em ALL your credit card numbers, and if one of them is LUCKY they'll send you a PRIZE." -Abe Simpson
"What's the matter?" "Oh, business is slow. People today are healthier and drinking less. You know, if it wasn't for the junior high school next door, no one would even use the cigarette machine." -Moe
"He was a good man. He was a kind man. He gave to his community, and asked little in return...It's a woman? Dear Lord! He he... well, I guess most of what I said can be salvaged..." -Apu
"Son, when you participate in sporting events, its not whether you
win or loose, its how drunk you get." -Homer
"I don't know! I don't know why i didt it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I'll do it again!"
"I guess some people never change. Or, they quickly change and then quickly change back."
"Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me!"
"...Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn."
"Unlike most of you, I am not a nut."
"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?"
"All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer."
"The sooner kids talk, the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word."
"Shut up, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip!"
"And... Lord, we're especially thankful for nuclear power, the cleanest, safest energy source there is, except for solar, which is just a pipe dream. Anyway, I'd like to thank you for the occasional moments of peace and love our family's experienced... well, not today. You saw what happened. Oh, Lord, be honest. Are we the most pathetic family in the universe, or what?" -Homer
"Have you always been a chick? I mean, y'know don't wanna offend you, but you were born a man, weren't you? You can tell me, I'm open-minded." -Homer
"That's where I saw the leprechaun. He told me to burn things."
"Maybe I can't concentrate because of all of your cooties!""It's called "lice", and it's nothing to be ashamed of. " -Milhouse & Lisa
"Well it doesn't matter how you feel inside, you know? It's what shows up on the surface that counts. That's what my mother taught me. Take all your bad feelings and push them down, all the way down, past your knees until you're almost walking on them. And then you'll fit in, and you'll be invited to parties, and boys will like you, and happiness will follow." -Marge
"Look at that pig, stuffing his face with with donuts on my time. That's right, keep eating. Little do you know you're drawing closer ever closer to the poison donut. There is a poison one, isn't there, Smithers?" -Monty Burns
"Oh, it's not a swindle. What you do is, see.. You give 'em ALL your credit card numbers, and if one of them is LUCKY they'll send you a PRIZE." -Abe Simpson
"What's the matter?" "Oh, business is slow. People today are healthier and drinking less. You know, if it wasn't for the junior high school next door, no one would even use the cigarette machine." -Moe
"He was a good man. He was a kind man. He gave to his community, and asked little in return...It's a woman? Dear Lord! He he... well, I guess most of what I said can be salvaged..." -Apu