IN

HAWAII

(The end of an old rerun of Mr. Belvadere goes off the air, and then the opening theme for "AFW Friday Night Lightning" flashes across the scene.)

Dane: Hello everyone, we are in Hawaii of all places! This is the first time that the AFW has ever ventured out of the mainland of North America, and we're happy about it. What a card we have for you tonight, as we are on the verge of AFW California Dreamin'. Joining me as always on Friday is Leroy "The Sex Toy" Townsend.

Leroy: And how glad I am to be here in Hawaii, where the ladies get the utmost pleasure from viewing my bodacious bod in a thong.

Dane: Spare me. We have quite a card for you tonight. Plus, we'll hear a few words from the President, and get the complete line-up for California Dreamin'!

Leroy: And don't forget, my main man The Master is gonna pay a visit to the AFW tonight.

Dane: Just what we needed. Anyhow, we've got a great match up for you right now, as the challenger comes to the ring.

(over the PA "Down" by Gravity Kills starts to play. I'm your fear.. the fans are going crazy as Monster Mitch comes down the aisle I'm your Monster Mitch climbs into the ring as the music and the lights start to go down. Wilde Tanke goes to the ring to silence and darkness. The fans are giving him a strong welcome. Tanke goes into the ring and waits for the bell.)

Dane: This will be a great title match for Wildlife.

Leroy: Yeah, whatever. Mitch is just a rookie he's lucky to be with the Brotherhood.

[ring ring ring]

Dane: Mitch and Wildlife go right at it. They lock up and Mitch throws Wilde into the ropes. On the rebound, he hits him with a chop to the throat.

Leroy: Dirty move on Mitch's part, but Wilde won't be that easily beaten.

Dane: Mitch picks up Wilde and punches him in the stomach and kicks him in the head knowing Wildlife down. He quickly picks him back up and throws him into the corner and runs in after him. But Wildlife moves to the side and Mitch hits the turnbuckles hard. Wildlife rams Mitch's head into the turnbuckle three times and throws him into the opposite corner.

Leroy: Wildlife is having his way with the challenger now.

Dane: Wildlife follows with a shoulder to Mitch's back. He quickly rolls up Mitch.

[one..two..th-]

Leroy: Mitch kicked out of that one with little time to spare.

Dane: Wildlife stomps on Mitch's head a couple of times and picks Mitch up and puts him in a pile driver. Wildlife picks Mitch up and gives him a belly-to-belly suplex.

Leroy: This one's over folks. Wilde goes for pin.

[one..two..-]

Dane: Mitch kicked out! I didn't think he had anything left.

Leroy: you didn't what?

Dane: I didn't think-

Leroy: That's right you didn't think.

Dane: Shut up. Wildlife is shocked! Mitch still hasn't gotten up yet. Wildlife picks up Mitch and throws him against the ropes.

Leroy: Oh my! Mitch can't even stand up he fell on his way to the ropes!

Dane: Wildlife looks very confused. He goes over to Mitch who really looks like he doesn't know what's going on. He stomps on his chest three times and goes to the top rope. He nails him with a leg drop. Wilde goes for the pin.

[one.two..thr-]

Leroy: WOW! Monster Mitch just won't go down!

Dane: Wildlife looks really annoyed right now. He's going to end this right now. He climbs up to the top rope and nails a perfect Chicago bulls Bulldog. He covers..

[one..two..three]

Dane: Wildlife retains the lightweight title! Mitch's effort was amazing as well, he just wouldn't let wildlife pin him.

Leroy: here come the paramedics, it looks like they are going to have to carry him off with a stretcher.

Dane: No, I guess Mitch will be able to walk this one out. He is helped out by the medics, but at least he doesn't have to be carried out on the stretcher.

Leroy: Who cares? Personally I'd like to see the both of them go out on stretchers. And we all know that EVERYONE would just like to see me, period.

Dane: Can you be any more conceded? Anyhow, this next match looks to be an easy one for the Amber Knight. He's up against Mozart, the lightweight.

Leroy: This really won't be much of a match for the Amber Knight, Mozart is out weighed by AK by at least 70 pounds.

Dane: But Mozart is a good enough wrestler to at least keep this interesting. It looks like Mozart is already in the ring waiting for the Knight.

(the Lights go out and spotlights start scanning the arena. Pachabel's Canon in D minor starts to play over the P.A. The crowd is going crazy as the Amber Knight makes his way into the arena. He looks very focused and very determined. As he climbs into the ring, the bell rings and Mozart goes right after him.)

Dane: Mozart is not wasting anytime. He runs and the Knight and clotheslines the former champion.

Leroy: The yellow knight was not ready for that one, he had just got into the ring. Good move by Mozart.

Dane: It is the AMBER Knight not the yellow knight.

Leroy: Shut up, amber is a yellowish color, so the Amber Knight is the yellow knight.

Dane: You are an idiot. As the AMBER Knight is getting up Mozart propels him-self off of the ropes and comes after AK. But AK is having no part in that. He catches Mozart and reverses it into a body slam. He picks Mozart up off the ground and gives him a piledriver. While Mozart is down, he gives him an elbow drop.

Leroy: It is not looking good for the lightweight Dane.

Dane: Not at all. AK lets off though and walks around the ring waiting for Mozart to get up.

Leroy: That wimp, why doesn't he finish it?

Dane: the Amber Knight has a lot of respect for the wrestlers here in the AFW and sometimes he just wants to see what they have. There's no harm in that.

Leroy: No harm, but a really stupid move, he will get his butt kicked someday because of that.

Dane: Maybe, maybe not, but the fans seem to like it. Mozart finally gets on his feet and charges the Knight. The Amber Knight sidesteps him and knocks him down with a clothesline. Mozart gets up and AK quickly locks him up.

Leroy: Dumb move on Mozart's part, there is no way he'll be able to over power the knight.

Dane: It looks like you are right. The Amber Knight puts Mozart in a belly-to-belly suplex. He goes for the cover..

[one..two..three]

Dane: The Amber Knight wins this one quite easily. Mozart really didn't ever stand a chance. But you've got to admire the guy for trying and not getting killed against the giant.

Leroy: The only thing I, and the rest of the people have to admire, is the perfection, the peak, the ruggedness, the greatness, and the all-out sexiness that my body has attained.

Dane: Well, we're set to see the debut of AFW newcomer Mase. Wait a minute! Mase and The Back Yard Bull Dog are already going at it. Mase runs at the dog and they lock up. Mase picks up the bull dog and give him a body slam. He stomps on BYBD's leg and them picks him up and throws him into the ropes. Mase bounces off the far ropes and goes after him. But the dog hits the ground and Mase goes over top of him. Mase comes back only to be greeted by a bull dog fist to his face. The dog picks Mase up and give him a Russian suplex.

Leroy: Here comes Zoltan down the aisle. He's got his magic pouch with him.

Dane: Backyard Bull Dog throws Mase into the corner and follows with a knee to Mase's back.

Leroy: Whoa! Zoltan made a magic spell and a big puff of smoke came out of the corner post. BYBD is not happy about that.

Dane: BYBD gives Mase a suplex and goes to yell at Zoltan. Mase gets up and hits the bull dog in the back of his head. BYBD turns around and levels Mase with a clothesline. He picks him up and bodyslams him hard.

Leroy: Uh no, Zoltan is floating his pig over the bull dog's head. He's trying to jump up and get it, but Zoltan is taunting him with the pig. The Dog is yelling at Zoltan telling him that if he gets his hands on the pig, it will be breakfast.

Dane: Mase gets up and sweeps the dog's legs out from under him. Bulldog gets up and throws Mase against the ropes and on the return he grabs him and gives him another suplex.

Leroy: Just as BYBD throws Mase to the mat, more fireworks explode from the corner posts. And Danny is set on the ground. The ref is trying to catch it, but to no avail. Mase is still on the ground so the Bull dog goes after Zoltan out of the ring.

Dane: The dog rushes Zoltan, but he sidesteps him and gives the dog a DDT on the concrete. Zoltan floats the pig away and leaves the arena. The ref sees BYBD out of the ring and starts to count him out.

[one..two..three..four..]

Dane: Mase is just starting to get up and the bulldog is still lying on the concrete. I don't think he's going to get up.

[seven..eight..nine..TEN!]

Dane: the winner by countout is MASE!!! Unbelievable win for Mase. Zoltan is gonna have hell to pay when he steps in the ring with the Backyard Bulldog at California Dreamin'. Speaking of which, at this time, I'd like to welcome the President of the AFW, Adam Stone!

(Stone makes his way to the center of the ring, as always. Dane is interviewing him.)

Dane: Well, I guess the first thing I'd like to ask you about is, Maximus Ordicus. This guy is our world champion, and he hasn't been around much lately.

Stone: I realize that Max knows that California Dreamin' could be the toughest night of his career. He and I had a meeting, and basically he told me that he wanted to lay low and train until the pay per view. That's fine with me, because he isn't contractually obligated to defend his title until then. Case closed.

Dane: Okay, the next thing I'd like to ask you about is the return of Jammin' and MasterIceman. How did you get these legends to return, and how do you feel about it?

Stone: With Jammin', I have to say that it was the Suicidal Ones that brought him back. They are the ones that got him to sign a contract to come back to the AFW, I just wrote the contract that allows him to wrestle at AFW events. As for MasterIceman, everyone knows that people were yearning for his return the minute he retired. Time and time again people tried to get him to return, but he wouldn't do it. I guess Jammin's return is what drove him to step back into an AFW ring. I must say, I'm very glad that they have both returned. Now there is no doubt in my mind that the AFW houses the very best wrestlers in the world of-

(The President is cut off by Leroy.)

Leroy: Um, excuse me you little fly with an ass the size of New York. You know that you still have doubts about having the best wrestlers in the world, because the very best, The Master, has been stuck in jail. Well, without further ado, making his big return, here is The Master!

(Master of Puppets blares over the speakers, and The Master does come down the aisle. Everyone, including the President is a bit baffled as to how he got out of jail.)

Stone: Before you say anything, I just wanna know how you got out of jail.

The Master: Simple, dipstick, I paid MY BAIL.

Stone: Oh, so in other words, once your court date is set, then you're going back, right after you're convicted of kidnapping?

The Master: We'll see about that.

Stone: Okay, look, I'll tell you what. As much as I'd love to see you stuck in a prison cell for a few years, I'd like to see you get your ass kicked first. So I have a proposal for ya. At California Dreamin', you'll compete in my "Gauntlet Challenge", against an unknown opponent.

The Master: What the hell is a gauntlet challenge?

Stone: It's a weapons-filled cage match, plain and simple. Anyhow, if you win-which you won't-all charges will be dropped. But if you lose, then you are going back to prison for a long time. What do you say?

The Master: Well, gee, let's see? I can either keep wrestling, because I WILL win, or I can just go back to jail, and risk having some guy named Bubba bothering me. You got yourself a deal Mr. President.

Stone: Now, get the hell outta here!

(The Master spits on the President, and then he leaves.)

Stone: Now, my final order of business is to announce that Jammin' and MasterIceman will be involved with the pay per view. In fact, they are going to go one on one!

(The crowd goes nuts.)

Dane: Oh my that one will be huge!

Stone: That's about it folks. Enjoy the rest of the show, and order California Dreamin'!

(A promo for California Dreamin' rolls. "Maximus Ordicus is the AFW World Champion. But it wasn't always that way. As a kid he grew up, fighting on the streets of Los Angeles everyday, many times on the losing end. Since he has joined the AFW, he has only lost to a select few men. And at California Dreamin', 3 of those men are gonna do battle for a right to face Maximus later in the night. Will Max be able to overcome the fact that he is going to face a man that he has lost to? Will he be able to overcome the fact that he has to return to Los Angeles to fight? We'll find out at AFW California Dreamin'.

Security, The Amber Knight, and "Afterlife" Wilde Tanke. These men all have one thing in common: They have defeated Maximus Ordicus. They are gonna do battle in an elimination style triangle match, and the winner gets a shot at Max later in the night. Can these men even survive this match to make it to Max?

Fire and Chapel, two men, one cage. These men have a lot to settle. Fire has to prove that he can beat Chapel. Chapel has to prove that it was no fluke when he beat Fire. It all comes to a head at California Dreamin'.

Suicide is a man possessed. A man who un-officially won the Master's Title. However, it didn't come to be. But in Los Angeles, he gets a real shot at the gold. A battle royal involving some of the best in the AFW will determine his opponent. Sure, Suicide gets the advantage of skipping the battle royal. But he doesn't know who his opponent will be. Will Suicide finally gain the gold he so craves, or will a man stand tall in the battle royal, and then go on to defeat Suicide?

Legends, that is the only way to describe former AFW Champions Jammin' and MasterIceman. For the first time since the early days of the AFW, these two men will go one- on-one. Who really is the better man?

The Master allegedly kidnapped former AFW President Alan Reidie. Why? Only he and the New Anti-AFW Order know. Although he should be rotting in jail, he is getting one last chance to stay out of the big house. But he's gotta beat the President's mystery opponent in a Gauntlet Challenge to do it.

A 3 million year old magician is perhaps the last thing standing in the way of The Backyard Bulldog and an AFW Title. For weeks Zoltan has heckled the Bulldog, and he's sick of it. At California Dreamin', the Dog is gonna show Zoltan that his bite is a hell of a lot more ferocious than his bark.

Gunslinger and Spawn are two men who apparently are enemies from the past. They will face off for the first time in the AFW. Not much is known about Gunslinger, but Spawn, one of the Suicidal Ones is ready to bring everything.

Violence and Monster Mitch. The NAAO and the Brotherhood. A battle of the Light Heavyweights. Violence claims to be the most reckless man on the face of the planet. Monster Mitch is ready to "take him dancing" and show that he is the true force in the Light Heavyweight Division.

Menace 2 Society are ready to make a run at some more tag team gold. But to do so, they are gonna have to go through the new, upstart tag team of the Magic Pimps. Yes, Zoltan's brother Charles and his partner are ready to go up against the skating duo of Fishbrain and Unity.

California Dreamin', one of the most important nights in wrestling history, order today.)

Dane: Wow! There is so much importance in that card, I don't see how anyone could miss it!

Leroy: I suppose it will be okay, but the REAL show will be me, because I'll be announcing at the show.

Dane: As will me and, making his announcing return, Brandon!

Leroy: My brother is coming back? Great, there go our decent ratings...

Dane: Well, it's time for our main event of the evening. Jeff Duane is getting his well-deserved U.S. Title shot against Security!

Leroy: I think it's a conspiracy that Security has to fight right before the pay per view.

Dane: Um, Amber Knight and Wilde Tank fought tonight as well.

Leroy: Oh, shut up.

(Security comes to the ring cursing at fans as usual. He has his U.S. Tag Title with him as well as the U.S. Heavyweight Title. The crowd boos the hell out of him.)

Dane: As ashamed as I am to say it, there is the U.S. Champion.

Leroy: Ashamed? I didn't think you were ashamed of anything, especially with that hair cut!

Dane: One of these days Leroy, one of these days. Anyhow, here comes Jeff Duane.

(Duane comes out to a big pop. The fans chant "Kick Security's ass", and things like that.)

Dane: They circle each other for a bit, Duane shoots in on the bigger Security! He takes him down with a spinebuster. Duane starts pounding on the champ! I think we may see lightning strike twice.

Leroy: Never, never, never. That last match that these guys had was a fluke. See, there ya go. Security just ducked a clothesline and delivered one of his own. Duane his holding his neck, ha!

Dane: Security picks up Jeff and whips him into the corner. He charges...and smashes Duane! Now he tosses Jeff back into the center of the ring and then delivers a neckbreaker.

Leroy: I'll be right back Dane, I think I see that lady giving me the eye...

Dane: Stay right here. I think she was getting a nervous twitch from seeing you. Anyhow, Security with a knee to the gut now. He slaps on a full nelson, but Jeff won't give it up. Duane is slumping to the ground now, Security may just end up knocking him out by cutting off the blood supply to the head with this full nelson!

Leroy: Look at that wimp Jeff Duane. He didn't even last two minutes-

Dane: It's not over yet! Duane is rising to his feet! The fans are on their feet! Duane with a couple of elbows to Security's mid section. Security lets go of the hold and Duane bounces off of the ropes-shoulderblock and Security is down. Duane with a legdrop and the cover 1, 2, kickout by Security.

Leroy: Jeff with a couple of headbutts and a butterfly suplex. I bet that didn't even hurt Security. Oh great, Jeff is going to the top rope. Double Ax handle and somehow Security goes down!

Dane: Jeff with a snapmare on Security, now he puts Security in a headscissor hold. Security busts out of it though, and gets up only to receive a dropkick.

Leroy: Um, uh, I'll be right back!

(Leroy takes off before Dane can stop him. He is apparently headed to the back.)

Dane: What a little rat. Duane delivers a few chops to the chest of Security, and it's turning candy cane red! Duane nails him with a shoulderbreaker, he's ready to finish this thing off!

(VP Robert D comes dashing down to ringside, and he's yelling something at Duane.)

Dane: Oh great, get that putz outta here now! Duane makes the big mistake, he just turned his back on Security. Security comes up from behind and nails Duane in the crotch! Oh no! He grabs the head of Jeff Duane and he's putting him up on the top rope. Here comes the Death Penalty. Damn that Robert! Wait! Duane shoves Security down to the mat. He jumps off for a splash now, but Security rolls out of the way. Both men get up, but Security is in better shape, and he nails Duane with a chokeslam. The cover now, one, two, three! What a matchup, Jeff Duane came so close to winning that title.