At last!! An all new collection of quotes that I can share with you and make you wonder just how many ferrets are scurrying around inside my brain. You know the idea behind the quote page. It will be a daily quote based on availability. (In other words I will post a quote a day unless I can't think of one, or unless I cannot make it to a computer or just don't feel like it. DEAL WITH IT!!) And now, without further ado: The quotes........
"Clarke's is a gay bar tonight."
Annonymous prankster as "Gene" "Writing about music is like dancing about architecture."
Elvis Costello
"I had the craziest puking days, I mean, who gets those anymore?"
Overheard in "Intro to Critical Theory"
"There's an old man sitting next to me, making love to his tonic and gin.
He says... what does he say, Matthew?"
"Mom" trying to sing "Piano Man"
"You really should learn the terminology, Marlo."
Matt Fornabaio
"Everyone will hit alt control and delete, and everything will be okay."
Anthony Lekas on the Millennium bug
"They don't close Florida"
Roy Walley
"If the Sun has faded away, I'll try to make it shine. There's nothing I won't do.
If you need a shoulder to cry on, I hope it will be mine, call me tonight, and I'll come to you."
The Beatles' "Anytime At All"
"That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown-"
Linus Van Pelt
"Love thy neighbor, but don't get caught."
Seen on a bumper sticker
"Say what you will about Charles Barkley, when he tells you he's going to do something,
he'll either do it, or he won't do it."
Karl Malone
"The President shouldn't have to answer questions from an asshole about a cigar."
Will Smith in Rolling Stone
"I asked him to channel Hendrix and requested "All Along the Watchtower."
You know, he's been dead almost twenty years, but he hasn't lost it."
Fox Mulder "Beyond The Sea"
"Thoughts meander like a restless wind inside a letterbox,
they tumble blindly as they make their way across the Universe."
The Beatles' "Across the Universe"
"She'd be a whole lot prettier if she smiled once in a while.
And even a smile looks like a frown, and she's seen her share of devils in this angel town.
Shawn Mullins' "Lullabye"
"You think it'll fit in the tank?"
Ryan Flaherty when asked if he wanted to trade in his fish for an orangutan.
"While the other guy's eating, I'm working. While the other guy's sleeping, I'm working.
While the other guy's having sex... well, I'm having sex, but I'm working real hard on it, Dave."
Will Smith on Letterman
"It seems our drinking team has a lacrosse problem."
Seen on a Fordham T-Shirt
"Bernie Goetz announced he's going to run for mayor of New York in the year 2001. His opponents say they're willing to debate him, but not on the subway."
Conan O'Brian
"We never expected this."
Dionne Warwick on the death of Jeannie Dixon
"Pardon my French, but Cameron is so tight, if you stuck a lump of coal up his ass, in two weeks you have a diamond."
Ferris Bueller
"Well I got my fine wife and I got my ol' fiddle, when the Sun's comin' up I got 'cakes on the griddle.
Life 'aint nothin' but a funny, funny riddle..."
John Denver's "Thank God I'm a Country Boy"
"This is the most politically correct band I've ever seen!"
Eric Lord on "Ozomalti"
"Bure's just as dumb as Nedved, and Nedved is an idiot."
Flyers GM Bob Clarke
"She takes hills like a matchless 'cause my Hondas built really light
She's more fun than a barrel of monkeys that two wheel bike.
The Hondells' "Little Honda"
"I'm gonna be freezing my (Maxim) Kuznetzov."
Mike Fornabaio
"When I take her to the drag she really shines (Giddyup, giddyup 409)
She always turns in the fastest time (Giddyup, giddyup 409)
My four speed dual quad positraction 409."
The Beach Boys' "409"
"Johnny Franco said if I didn't come back he'd have my legs broken."
Mike Piazza
"It's a shame he lives in the city. He's depriving some small village of a pretty good idiot."
Mike Milbury on Zigmund Palffy's agent Paul Kraus.
"Did you know your number is 1-800-FARTING?"
Anonymous prankster
"Why isn't the WNBA the KNBA west of the Mississippi and in Pittsburgh??"
Mike Fornabaio
"Oh a Sailor sails to far away lands and goes wherever he pleases,
and he always remembers to wash his hands so he won't get no diseases!"
Pee-Wee Herman and Phil Hartman
"Clapton is God"
British grafitti
"That was, quite possibly, the line of the century."
Rob Rohde
"What kind of man wears Armor Hot Dogs?"
Superintendent Chalmers
"Even though I'm in love, sometimes I get so afraid. I say something so wrong, just to have something to say.
Billy Joel's "Leave a Tender Moment Alone.
"Once again, for your safety, please buckle up."
Ram Van Driver. (Note, I had never heard a Ram Van driver tell anyone to "buckle up," so out of fear, I did so.)
"Johnny's in the basement mixing up the medicine, I'm on the pavement, thinking about the government."
Bob Dylan's "Subterranean Homesick Blues"
"There are places I remember all my life, though some have changed. Some forever not for better, some have gone and some remain."
The Beatles' "In My Life"
"You take a piece of whatever you touch; too many pieces means you're touching too much."
Billy Joel's "Great Wall of China"
"When Cameron was in Egypt's land; Let my Cameron go."
Cameron Fry
"It was a good shot on net, unfortunately it was my own."
Bobby Holik
"I have too much time on my hands and not enough time!"
Matt Fornabaio (me)
"If you plan to shoplift, please let us know. -Thanx"
Sign on store counter in "Clerks"
"You gotta love living, baby, 'cause dying's a pain in the ass."
Frank Sinatra
"You're the cutest thing that I ever did see;
I really like your peaches, wanna shake your tree."
The Steve Miller Band's "The Joker"
"Please be advised that you are informed as I am informed."
Motorman on the D train
"Had it been another day I might have looked the other way but I'd have never been aware, and as it is I'll dream of her tonight, di,di,di,dididi."
The Beatles' "I've Just Seen a Face"
"Who the Hell is that???"
Z
"I'll see you later! Enjoy the deposition!"
Jon Randolph
"We're havin' a party; dancin' to the music, played by the DJ on the radio."
Sam Cooke's "We're Havin' a Party"
"If the Hindus are so pure, what are they doing watching 'MTV'?"
Madonna
"It's 'She's The Fastest' followed by 'Always Comes in Second' and 'I'm Number Three'"
Dog Track announcer on "The Simpsons"
"The future just ain't what it used to be."
Green Day's "Uptight"
"I knew where I was, I just didn't know where I was!"
Matt Fornabaio