Hypothetically Frequently Asked Questions
1. Who's Chuck Long?
Chuck Long is a former NFL quarterback who had a less-than-stellar career. So with a resume like that, you'd think he'd go on to have a long (no pun intended) and illustrious run in the NFL. You'd be wrong.
Drafted #12 overall by the Detroit Lions in 1986, Chuck was not quite the savior the Lions expected. His best season was 1987, in which he threw 2,598 yards, 11 touchdowns and 20 interceptions. After four woeful seasons behind center, Chuck packed his bags for the sunny skies of Los Angeles. In 1990, he threw for a whopping 5 yards as a Ram. Shortly thereafter, professional football vanished from Los Angeles entirely. Coincidence? You be the judge. Chuck probably kicked around for a few years, got drunk on occasion, and maybe stabbed a few hobos. Nobody really knows for sure. In 1995, he joined the football coaching staff at his alma mater. After working his way from secondary coach to quarterback coach, he moved on to the University of Oklahoma in 1999. As a Sooner, Chuck first worked as the quarterbacks coach and passing game coordinator. His tutelage of Josh Heupel was no doubt instrumental in the Sooners' NCAA championship in 2000. In 2002, he was given control of the entire Oklahoma offense. The Sooners notched 12 wins each of the next three seasons. (Sure, they dipped to 7-4 in 2005, but you can blame that on the defense.) In December 2005, Chuck Long was named the head football coach at San Diego State. It's expected he will lead the team into immediate title contention. Of course, the title could be "Best-Dressed Football Team" or "NCAA Laughingstock," but a title's a title.
2. What's fantasy football? A predetermined number of "franchises" select players before the NFL season. Those players' real-life statistical performances relate to points. So you want to select players who will perform better throughout the year. At the end of the year, a playoff tournament determines the league's winner. Money is involved, so it's kinda like gambling. But not really. In any case, it makes the season more fun to watch, since you're always rooting for/against players throughout the 32 NFL franchises. 3. So why dedicate a fantasy football league to this Chuck Long guy? In actuality, the league's founder would be the best to answer this. Since he's departed, the current commissioner will do his best to sum it up:
Ask yourself how many players make it to the NFL. How many of those actually see playing time? How many of them never live up to their potential? And what's up with all that? The thing is, Chuck is emblematic of the thousands of players who enter the league with big dreams, only to have them shattered in front of millions of spectators. He's not among the rarified few to make it to the Hall of Fame. He's just a big guy with a big arm and poor decision-making abilities. He's mortal. So perhaps the question isn't "Why Chuck?" but rather "Why not Chuck?"
Besides, he's basically the poster-child for a string of failed Lion quarterbacks. Since Bobby Layne in the 1950s, no one in the organization has thrown worth a damn. We have hope for Joey Harrington, but he could just as easily become a Charlie Batch, Scott Mitchell, Erik Kramer, Rodney Peete, Eric Hipple, Andre Ware, Gary Danielson or Bob Gagliano.
4. So, this Chuck Long guy endorses your site? Once, we had a league member contact Iowa's alumni association and we got Chuck's address and stuff. But we didn't do anything with it. We swear. We're not all creepy and stalkerish. We just worship the guy. 5. Can I join? Probably not. We're a fairly close-knit group of about 15 people. Plus, we don't draft online. We do it old school - at a restaurant with pens and paper. But, if you happen to live in West Michigan, and there just happens to be an opening, and you're not a douchebag, we might consider it. 6. Who are your league members? When the league began in 1995, everyone was (or recently had been) a student at Portage Northern High School. As the years went by, most of the original owners left, and we added new ones. Friends, coworkers, roommates and other assorted rogues filled the ranks. We typically have one or two teams leave every year, but we have a very solid core of about 10 franchises. 7. So what's different from the 1995 version? Just about everything but the name. In 1995, the league was founded by a guy named Scott Sloan. The draft took place in Brian Bayer's basement. Everyone had to draft a tight end, and it was a mess. There was no "schedule." It was just your guys versus everyone else for straight-up points. Then, near the end of the year, only two or three teams had a chance to take the overall point total, and it sucked. Stats were either mailed or handed out in the week after the games. Numbers were frequently wrong. It's amazing how far we've come. The only innovation remaining from that day are the fact that certain players can be retained. Also, we have four of the founding owners remaining: Ted Rafferty, John Hach, Chad Longtin and Ben Bowman.
1996 - Scott Sloan resigned as Commissioner and Ben Bowman took over. The league began to take shape. The draft was held at a place called Chianti (now Gallagher's) on Stadium Drive in Kalamazoo. That affair was a fiasco, as many of the old teams had fallen away, new teams comprised of jack-asses joined in, and there were far too many teams. Somehow, the season took off. This was the first year we brought in head-to-head scheduled combat, divisions and a Super Bowl/Toilet Bowl configuration.
The Anchorage Naked Runners, owned by Dan Tobis, became the first in a long line of teams to receive a lifetime ban from the league for not paying off a free agent. 1997 - The draft occurred at the Annex at Wings Stadium. Very cool. Burned out, Ben Bowman relinquished the Commissionerhood. A guy named Brian Jewett picked up the flag and started to run with the ball. He even started a crude website. But it became quickly apparent that Mr. Jewett had his head up his butt. Ben Bowman stepped in and retook the reigns mid-season. With a lack of web-expertise, stats were either e-mailed or handed out in old school style. The mid-season leadership change was tumultuous, but the league would not have survived without it. 1998 - The draft was held in probably its worst all-time location: the Mount Royal Townhouse home of Mike Slager and Mike Barton. Crowded and cramped, almost no one enjoyed themselves. (Although, Scott Sloan got liquored up crazy-style and still ended up with a great team.) But 1998 saw an important innovation. This very website came into some form of existence. Back then, it was a crude, frightening place. It pretty much had stats and that was it. That was also the first year teams could chose their offense. A great and unique option that hasn't been duplicated by any other league on record. Also, the "X-Factor" made its first appearance. That was in response to the number of teams whining about how they had to pick two quarterbacks, kickers, etc. 1999 - Draft locale was the Moorsbridge Country Club. The website grew stronger and the league began to settle in terms of membership. 2000 - The draft began its stay at Main St. Pub. Cheerleaders were adopted and all was merry. 2001-present - The league is under the steady hand of a Commissioner with far too much time on his hands. The site continues to grow and evolve. So much so, that an F.A.Q. was written in September, 2003. Whodathunkit? 
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As a college QB for the University of Iowa, Chuck was a beast.
A First Team All-America selection, Chuck Long was awarded the 1985 Maxwell Award, as the nation's top player, the Davey O'Brien Award, as the nation's top quarterback, and was the runner-up for the Heisman Trophy to Bo Jackson in the closet race in the award's history. In regular season play, he threw for 9,210 yards. Including the bowl games, he became the first quarterback in NCAA history to throw for over 10,000 yards (10,461). A three-time All-Big Ten selection and Big Ten Athlete of the Year, as a senior, Long set school and conference passing records with 10,461 yards and 74 touchdowns on 782 completions (including bowl games). He led the Hawkeyes to four bowl games and was the MVP of the 1982 Peach Bowl and 1983 Freedom Bowl. As a junior, he set an NCAA record with 22 straight completions and finished seventh in the Heisman Trophy balloting. He led his teams to a 35-13-1 record.
Technically? No. In fact, he could probably sue us and shut us down if he really wanted. But we hope if he ever does stumble upon this little internet tribute to his (lack of) greatness, he'd have a sense of humor about it and send us an e-mail, a signed jersey and a marble bust of his head.