ACTUAL CHURCH BULLETIN AND SERVICE BLOOPERS

1. Our next Song is "Angels we have heard get high".

2. Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help.

3. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

4. The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of REV. AND MRS. JULIUS BELZER.

5. This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

6. Wednesday the Ladies' Liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "PUT ME IN MY LITTLE BED" accompanied by the pastor.

7. Thursday at 5pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mother's Club. All ladies wishing to become "Little Mothers' will meet with the pastor in his study.

8. This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

9. The service will close with "LITTLE DROPS OF WATER." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

10. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.

11. Thursday night potluck supper. Prayer, and medication to follow.

12. The Lutheran Men's Group will meet at 6pm. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.

13. A Bean Supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

14. 8 choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some older ones.

15. The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

16. At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

17. The preacher will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth With Joy."

18. The eight graders will be presenting Shakespeare's "Hamlet" in the church basement on Friday at 7pm. The congregation is invited to attend the tragedy.

19. The associate minister unveiled the church's new giving campaign slogan last Sunday: "I UPPED MY PLEDGE -- UP YOURS"



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