I got told!!! My Aunt Donna advised me that she could never remember me referring to or addressing either of my parents as "Mother", "Mom", but Mama, and/or "Father", "Dad" or "Pop" but Daddy. So, I have to go through all this and change all this, because these were my Mama and Daddy! Always were, and always will be!!
My father was also a family man! He was 'there' as a father, even when he was away! Any major problems, or requests by my brother or I, were always handled by both parents, even if it had to be done through the mail.
Daddy was a fair man. He never believed in "Do as I Say, not as I Do"! He also didn't believe in Peer Pressure! If our friends could talk us into doing something that we knew was wrong, then shame on us. Or, (and this was more often the case) we did it just to impress our friends. It just seemed like I always got caught in whatever 'wrong' I attempted to do. Especially when it was something one, or more of my friends seemed to be getting by with. (Just lucky, I guess)! Daddy told me, once, the way to keep from getting caught was easy! Don't do the deed in the first place! Kind of hard to get caught if you aren't doing it! I skipped school one time, got caught, of course. Guess the Principal was having a rough day, because he decided to make an example out of me. It was 'unfair', I told Daddy. Daddy told me "that's the chance you take...and should have thought of that possibility before doing it". He was right!
Dad was a very direct person! When he asked a question, one that required a yes or no answer, that was all that he wanted to hear. Aah, but I couldn't do that!! *Grin*--Always had to add the 'but', or even ask 'why' before answering! I don't believe Daddy was ever late for anything in his life! He expected no less of us! If we had 11pm curfew, it didn't mean 11:05! We always knew what the discipline was for being late, not doing our chores, or what ever! We got spankings, (yes, he believed in that) when we were pretty young. He never allowed emotions, temper, or anything to influence him when he was spanking us. He made sure he was totally in control of himself, and not spanking when mad! Same rule applied when he would discipline in other ways, as in restrictions! We always knew where we stood, what was expected of us, and what to expect when we messed up, or did very good! He was home every night, unless he was overseas.
Daddy was my first Knight in Shinning Armor! As is often the
case for many young girls! It was always Daddy that I went to when I wasn't
feeling well. He would rock me, and sing to me! He had a deep soothing
voice, that always seemed to make me feel better. He'd sing silly goofy
songs, sometimes! Other times just warm ones. While he could be very strict,
unbending, and sometimes hard, he was also warm and loving! He never forgot
to notice when we did right, even when it was something that was expected
of us in the first place! He felt discipline, and correction, was important,
but so was approval!
Mama was also an artist! She even went to school, took art classes, and did quite a few things that I will always cherrish. Mother had a green thumb that would never quit! She could make anything grow! We always had house plants! Those house plants also took a shower early on Saturday mornings. (Before the housecleaning started)! Mothers house was always neat and clean! No dust bunnies under her bed or couch. Must not forget, her ideas for the house "A place for everything, and everything in it's place"!
Mama had lots of good little quotes! Like - "Do Unto Others
as You Would Have Them Do Unto You" "People in Glass Houses Shouldn't Throw
Stones", "Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged", "If You Can't Say Something Nice,
Don't Say Anything at All", and many more. She had a Plate on her kitchen
wall that she loved, and basically lived by.
It never paid to gripe to Mama, or whine about what we didn't have! We used to say she lived with rose colored glasses. She saw nothing wrong, or bad! Period! "The glass is not half empty, but half full"!
You think Mama was a softy? NO! Not really! If we asked Daddy if we could do, or go somewhere, and he said no. It did not work to then go and ask Mama! (Or visa- versa, for that matter.) They always checked with the other one, just in case! These two people worked "TOGETHER" in raising us! There was always a lot of love in our home! I can remember 2 arguements that Mama and Daddy had. One when I was very young (when father went into the army, I think) and again when I was 34! In other words, they didn't air their differences (if they had any) in front of my brother and I. They didn't think that was good for kids.
They were sweet when Daddy retired! Mama didn't wash another dish, and Daddy had whatever he wanted for meals. She did all the cooking, fixing things he really liked. I swear sometimes, it seemed like she used every pan in the house! I mentioned that one time, father told me to leave her alone, if she wanted to use every pan in the house to cook that dish he wanted, she could! I left it alone from then on! They spoiled each other! They were beautiful people. They loved each other, and did not part - until death. I have some beautiful memories of them!
FINALLY!! With help of two very good friends, (Helen Cook and Jim Roberts) a picture of my parents!
We played a lot of games together! Monopoly, dominoes, canasta, then pinochle! A few other games, of course, but these were the main ones. Mama and Daddy didn't believe in 'throwing' a game so the 'kids' can win once in a while. If we wanted to win, we had to learn how to play our best! Makes a difference when you know you won because you played good! There were many times when we didn't have our furniture and house hold goods yet, and nothing to do but listen to the radio, or play games! Mama and Daddy taught Ri and I how to dance when I was 7 and Ri was 8-1/2! (Of course, I danced on Daddy's feet for the beginning) So, on those nights with nothing to do, we often danced! I do not remember but just a very few times that Mama and/or Daddy went out without Ri and I, throughout my childhood!
We also read a lot! Mama and Daddy always did like their paper-back books! Daddy was usually into westerns, and Mama liked Mysteries! When my brother and I got the mumps, and had nothing to do but lie in bed, Mama went out and got a couple books for us. Nancy Drew for me, and The Hardy Boys for Ri. These books, even in the 40's, were printed and developed by the reading levels. As book 1 was for the lowest reading level. As you went up in the book #'s, the reading levels came up too! (Found this out when I went hunting for reading material for my own sons)! Well, when both Ri and I had read our book, we swapped out and read the other. So, Mama went out and got more! I believe we read the whole set of both by the time we reached our teens. Sometimes Mama and/or Daddy would make popcorn, rootbeer floats, get a good music station on the radio, and we would all settle down to read. Since we all really got 'into' our books, the only sounds were coming from the radio, perhaps a 'crunch' of popcorn, or such!
Whenever Daddy got to the new post first, he would try to get out in the evenings and look the place over. Making note of those areas that we needed to know about, and stay out of! Every town has them! He always took us out to see those areas, and to make note of the street names, and land marks! I was then, (and still am) one of those that could get lost just going around the block! I would also forget street names, and etc. Dad never put me down, or allowed anyone else to, for any of this. (Any thing else, for that matter)! Instead, we started looking for ways to teach me, or other ways to help me to remember! First thing we did was for ME to write down the names of those streets, and/or landmarks, as we looked at them. Do you know, oddly enough, that did the trick! I kept those lists, of course, but rarely had to even look at them! Now, about the getting turned around, lost, that was quite a bit harder to do! Even my lists didn't help me there. We did finally discover that I could follow a map! A good detailed map! Only one problem, if I was going south, the map had to be turned so south was in front of me! Looks kind of funny to some people - But it worked/works for me! We also got all public bus schedules, routes, and aquainted ourselves with what went where.
Daddy also got the 'temperature' of the town! In those days, some people didn't want the bases, the military or military families there. This didn't happen very often, but when it did, we pretty much stayed on the base. Sometimes, if things were too unfriendly in town, the military installed thier own dependent school on base. Those were usually just elementary schools! This was not the rule, but the exception, that any town was that unfriendly. Daddy always said the reason they were like that might well be due to some bad actions on the part of one or more military personnel, or their families. Daddy always said it would never be due to any of us (meaning he, myself, my brother or mother)! He meant it too! While it was never good to mess up, it was very unwise to do so in town!
Mama and Daddy took us to Operas, Ballets, Theatre, Museums, fancy Dining Rooms, and whatever else they could afford. Not often, but at least once! We went to a carnival once, and they had one attraction that neither Mama nor Daddy liked. We, Ri and I, wanted to see it. It was a Freak Show! Just before they outlawed them, and their methods. While they did not actually say flat out NO, they did try to steer us away from it. That should have been a warning sign to us! That perhaps we would really find it unpleasant too! We had to see for ourselves! That was the first, and last one, we ever went in to see! Not because the person was so terrible, but because of the way he was treated. Those should have been outlawed long before they were! I won't go into any details, because it makes me mad to this day!
I've many, many more memories - too many to put down on paper, or in this home page! I know of no better way to do them Honor, than to put this here, for all to see! They were good parents, the best I could ever have wanted! They raised us, taught us, directed us the best they could, loved us, but they also let us grow up! Probably one of the most important, to me at least, is that both these two people believed, and lived, what they taught us.