Okay, okay... I am not into spoofing marriage or weddings, but this has GOT to be some of the... hmmm... oddest? clipart I have EVER seen! You'll see! This stuff is SO strange I can't remember where I got it*. You are gonna laff. Are you ready to proceed? We are going to call this section...

Let me introduce you to Therlene to the left. She is a good example of how NOT to do your makeup on your wedding day. Let 's face it, she is just absurd. Seriously, though... What DOES one do with this piece of clipart, other than put it on a "Why Wed???" page. Therlene is NOT worth the wed.

Therlene is unreal. If she is unreal, what/who is THIS??? Let's call her Miss Led.

Whoever did her hair dented her head on the top! What's with those sleeves?!? I feel sure--that due to the affect on the sleeves--there a wingless ostrich or swan lies dead somewhere!

And WHAT is going on with that neckline?! I am not going to pursue that one any further. You will do enough thinking there all on your own?

Is that a "matching" black umbrella you are hiding there, dear? Oh yea, it matches your shoes! Is that a "matching black petticoat?" Oh, boy!

And while we are descending, WHAT happened to the skirt of this gown? It looks like it fell down to her KNEES? Who designed this original? This is TOO silly! How does a person use such an image?

This charming couple has just tied the knot. This is is Mr. & Mrs. Probo Oscoty.

From their first encounter, Suzy was always able to look past Probo's odd name right to his dazzling personality and smile. Over the months prior to their matrimonial union, Suzy felt she had gotten to know Probo very well. But there was one big secret that he had kept from her...

Probo and Suzy had agreed to limit their physical relationship before their wedding. This included saving their first kiss for their wedding day.

At last, after much anticipation the day had arrived. It was a beautiful wedding, with the usual nervous smiles and shaking bouquets. It seemed like a brief blur of only about 5 minutes when the preacher cheerfully announced, "I now present to you for the first time... Mr. & Mrs. Probo Oscoty!"

The crowd cheered and clapped! In all of the excitement, the minister forgot to permit the first kiss. A nervous Probo kissed Suzy on the cheek, held his breath and kept his secret just a little longer...

At the reception, the conversation bristled as the dance emsemble played the selection for the first dance of the newlyweds. Suzy and Probo took to the floor.

It was a special slowdance song. Suzy gazed into the eyes of dear Probo. Caught up in the moment, Probo kissed Suzy like a husband should. Alas! His secret was about to be revealed!

They were the only two in the room, swooning to the tunes. Probo suddenly got presence of mind and realized it was TOO LATE!

CREEPY CRAWLERS! His gobblety-goop nose had melted ALL OVER the side of her face! Probo grinned, hoping she would not notice, but how could she miss. She lovingly pulled his melted nose off of her face, fashioned it back in place (reserving a small portion to form into a tiny plastic spider) and they kissed again...

Being a "toon"... Probo suffered from a BAD slip of the pen around the middle of the face, resulting in a weird nose. Who told the artist, "Sure... that drawing looks gReAt!"?

(No story this time. You will have enough fun thinking of your own lines!)

He said to her, "Whatever is in this punch, dahling, has turned our skin this hideous shade of peach!"

She replied, "I know, and look what is has done to my veil!"

NOTE: This clipart came from a gallery that has shut down. We think these pics came from an old clipart book. These comments are not directed at an artist or intended to hurt anyone's feelings. Sometimes, things just don't turn out they "way they are sposta" on the 'puter. This is all in fun.