"Carpe
Mortem"
--quinque--
(a
short story)
She sits on the cold, hard tile of the bathroom floor, barely
thinking. Her mind is a black cloud of indiscernible emotion.
She questions everything, trusts nothing, yet barely thinks. Her
ears buzz with the thick humming of silence but she is aware of the rat's
footsteps downstairs. He is scurrying. She knows. He
is scurrying.
She
closes her eyes and focuses on the comforting emptiness of life that plays
blankly behind her lids. It is nothing, yet to her it is all that
is left. Her hands shake a little, just a little. Perhaps she
is not as stoned as she thinks she is. (she is nervous) She licks
her lips and concentrates for the first time. Her head spins dizzily
at the conscious effort she makes to utilize logic. At last, she
clears the cloud away and witnesses the steady flow of thought within.
She waves hello to the rat swimming in her head, takes not of the toilet
passing by. It was all pleasant scenery.
His
face suddenly appears and for a moment her heart comes alive and she is
struck by an actual physical pain. Her eyes fly open and the cloud
creeps back to swamp her mind. She sighs -- disappointed. She
reaches for her trusty Zippo and sparks a flame. She does not smoke.
It is his lighter.
She
focuses instead on the tiny tongue of fire. It waves madly at her.
She smiles. Good old Zippo. Always so friendly. Then
the room became blurry and the fire was all that she saw. The fire
was all that mattered.
"It
was a pleasure to burn,"* she thought. Fire erased everything.
Fire cleansed everything. Again his face swam up in her unconscious.
She stared at him bravely. He smiled, and winked. Some part
of her wanted to falter, wanted to accept defeat. She would not bow
down.
She
stared. And concentrated...and focused. His face burst into
flame and the lighter erased him. Good old Zippo. Always so
friendly.
She
felt warm. Very warm. beads of sweat gathered on her brow and
above her lip. She wiped them away and breathed deeply. And
then came the fire. it was crawling up her arm. Somehow, it
had already caught onto her hair. She was burning**.
"It
was a pleasure to burn." She smiles.
And
her ashes sit on the cold, hard tile of the bathroom floor.
--CHrySteL
11/8/95
note:
*...from Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451
**...pyrokinesis
often results in freak spontaneous combustion